Hospital Day Eleven

Today was rather uneventful. This weekend we're just killing time until the gastrostomy button procedure on Monday. It was my turn to sleep at home - so that's what I did. I ate dinner at about 4:30 p.m. and then crashed at 5:00 p.m. for my 13 hour beauty rest. The previous night I didn't sleep much in the hospital.

If anyone would like to see what a "button" looks like, click on this link for a few images (it's the clear one with what looks like a nipple at the bottom). If you scroll through the images you'll get a pretty good idea what Jonathan's going to have done. It looks a lot like a common rubber opening, such as on a beach ball, inflatable mattress, etc.

Jonathan is back to old self. He's smiling at all of the nurses (the little flirt) and is a busy little bee. I took a few pictures since we're going to end up spending two weeks of our life here.

Hospital Day Ten

Today we found out the results of the all-important stomach emptying test. Danielle, our favorite nurse, peeked at the record early this morning. Although the doctor is the one who is supposed to interpret and communicate the results, she peeked anyway and gave us the good news. After the two hours had passed, Jonathan's stomach had emptied down to 47%. He only slightly passed the 50% mark necessary to be considered normal. As suspected, his system is a bit slow/on the high end of normal, but it is still considered normal.

It was our normal pediatrician's turn on the floor, so I was able to talk to him about the results when he stopped by our room. He said the same thing...slow but normal...normal just like every other test we have run. Although not the expert, his recommendation was to only get the G Tube put in so that we can feed him. The other procedures discussed (surgery) seemed excessive in this situation. We always have the option of surgery in the coming weeks and months if things don't work out at home. More and more this is looking like a behavioral/poor eater situation. Our approach to get things checked out while we here appears to be working itself out. We've had to stay a few days longer because of all of the tests done, but in the end it means peace of mind about his GI system.

The opinion that mattered most was Doctor Yasdi's. I didn't get to talk with him until mid afternoon. He confirmed the test results and basically said that everything he's looked at appears to be normal. The G Tube is a no-brainer in this situation, so we mainly discussed what the options were in terms of surgery to tighten the upper stomach (keeps the vomiting down, etc). I asked him how he felt about taking this one step at a time instead of jumping right to the knife to tighten the stomach. He had no problem doing a trial run to see if Jonathan could keep formula down over the next few days. It is my opinion after talking to him that he perceived Jonathan to be more of a vomit comet then he really is - hence the surgery to help prevent that. I maintain that the sickness really interfered with our stay more/longer then realized. It's not difficult to see why he would think that...the little guy has been vomiting most of the time we've been here.

The result was that he increased the formula amount to five ounces from four, and then will increase from five to six tomorrow for each feeding. If Jonathan can keep 6 ounces down at a time then we're "golden". This is a trial run...but if successful, might prevent a permanent surgery from happening. At 4 p.m. this afternoon he took five full ounces through his NG tube like a champ. He didn't even flinch - in fact, the opposite happened. He played hard and was quite happy (presumably because he had a full belly). If he can keep it down here, there's no reason he can't keep it down at home since it's essentially going happen in the same manner.

In the late afternoon, the surgeon came by to introduce himself. He told us that he had a time slot available at 12:30 p.m. on Monday for the G Tube "install". Assuming everything goes well between now and then with the feedings, we'll be headed home shortly. We'll have a way to feed him enough yet can manage it more on our own terms. If things don't work out, we can always address that at a later time. Keeping fingers crossed...

The best part about today was that Jonathan was completely back to his old self. He was smiling and laughing at everyone. Because he will be getting enough fluids from his feeding tube right now, we were able to stop his IV. That meant that in between feedings we could disconnect him completely from all of the tubes. It was nice to finally hold him without having to drag anything else around.

Hospital Day Nine

Jonathan did really well with the feeding changes. He took four ounces of formula twice - once at 4 p.m. and again at 7 p.m. During the night he was still on a constant drip, but the small volume didn't bother him. Interestingly enough, the volume he kept down last night was the same amount he was vomiting up during previous attempts. Sounds to me like the virus/infection was complicating things and now that he is over it he can tolerate food.

Today was extremely uneventful for me. I had to go home in the morning and prepare for my interview at 11 a.m., so I missed the gastric emptying study. They basically tossed in some isotopes into his feeding tube and measured the rate at which the radioactive material moved its way through Jonathan's system. In a very anti-climatic finish, we never did get the final results of this big study. I think we will find out the complete results sometime tomorrow morning when we talk to the doctor. From what I hear, the preliminary results seemed to indicate that his system was slow...how slow is key to understanding his condition (if he has one). Gastroparesis is defined as after two hours, 50% or more of the food ate is still in the stomach. I'm not sure the test even went that long, in all honesty. We think that's the issue we're dealing with, but we need more information to confirm that. Gastroparesis has no known cause. The offender is the vagus nerve - the nerve responsible for the contraction (and thus movement of food through) the stomach.

To me, the degree to which his system is slow is important. It's important because we're now facing a decision to make about surgery. If his system is slow but not severely, do we try and manage this first and foremost with other options and leave surgery as a last resort? What damage can be done if we take him home and feed him through a tube for a few weeks to see what happens? We'd all have time to decompress, regroup, and explore all options before just going straight for the knife. In this sense I don't feel like we've done our due diligence. The doctor has been great but we haven't had this discussion yet...probably because it was too early to have it. So many questions right now. I think the doctor might be trying to assist us on the assumption we just want it taken care of. The more I think about it, the more I'd like to take it all one step at a time. That is, get a diagnosis, talk alternatives and treatment (another consultation after our hospital stay at his office perhaps), and then go from there. If the best course of action is surgery, then so be it. I don't want to have surgery done without really thinking and talking through all of our options. I'm not sure after this stint in the hospital we're in the best shape right now to make decisions of this nature if we don't have to. This, of course, all assumes that we can keep him fed enough with a simple outpatient procedure (giving him a new belly button for syringe feedings) in the meantime.

However, if things work out where staying in the hospital and having surgery is the best option, it looks like we could be here through the weekend and all next week for recovery time. Brutal. I can't take another day like today - coffee for breakfast, peanut butter and jelly sandwich for a snack, McDonald's sausage breakfast burrito on the way to the interview, a slice of pizza and soda for a late lunch, then a trip to Taco Bell for dinner. We just don't have any food left in the house and can't be bothered to cook anything when we get home. I need to make better choices otherwise we WILL be having a surgery discussion...about me.

Hospital Day Eight

Last night while asleep Jonathan vomited (again). We don't know why this only happens at night while he's asleep. I can only guess it has something to do the fact that he's been on a slow drip all day and his system really slows down at night. That, or it's just because he's laying face down on his stomach. It's like Old Faithful. It wasn't too big of a deal since he was going to have feedings cut off around three in the morning so that his system would be empty for the scope this morning.

At about 9:30 in the morning we were escorted to the basement of the hospital to begin Jonathan's endoscopy. We were taken to a smaller room with a bed and the necessary equipment. When everything was ready Stacey laid him down on the bed. The anesthesiologist put the mini-sized mask over his mouth and after three big breaths in between crying he was sound asleep. We waited for about 45 minutes until Doctor Yasdi came to the waiting room to tell us that everything looked fine. He didn't find anything abnormal, too small, or inflamed in his esophagus, stomach, or top of his small intestine. Good news. They took a biopsy with the scope, more blood for lab work, and changed out the two old IVs with new ones in his hand and foot. The best part about that is he no longer has a huge bandage on his head.

We were brought to the anesthesia recovery room were we found Jonathan already awake and in the nurse's arms. He bounced right back from the anesthesia - unlike a girl around Julia's age that took hours (she's also staying in our area) to stop screaming. Since he hadn't eaten for over 12 hours all he wanted was Stacey. She nursed him back to "mental health" and after 45 minutes in the recovery room we were escorted back to our room. Shortly after returning to our room Doctor Yasdi came in to tell us that the labs had been completed and that Jonathan's liver counts were all basically back to normal. Whatever Jonathan had caught was probably gone - a long 10 days after he initially couldn't keep anything down. The doc said this case is looking more and more like a healthy kid with a poor appetite. We only have one more test tomorrow that would cause him to believe otherwise.

During the endoscopy they had to remove his NJ tube. This time both Stacey and I both declined to be with him when they put the new NG tube down his nose and into his stomach. Since things are working themselves out (and because of the night vomiting), Doctor Yasdi switched him to normal, everyday Enfamil formula and changed his eating schedule. We need to start testing how he will do with a dose of food similar to eating and similar to how we will feed him when we go home. At 3 p.m. we gave him four ounces over the course of an hour through his tube. We took a three hour break and are feeding him another four ounces right now while I type this post. This time he has been asleep the entire time. The only other difference from the continual feeding at night and this approach is that he was given an antacid at 3 p.m. and I'm going to keep him upright in the backpack (this part is my idea). I don't know about you, but even I wouldn't tolerate drinking something while I was lying face down on my stomach. The night vomiting could be as simple as that. I figure when we go home were not going to be feeding him while he's sleeping anyway.

Tomorrow is the last test - stomach emptying. We'll see how this goes. Maybe everything we've seen in the hospital was just a result of his sickness. Maybe he's really just a normal kid with too much "important work stuff to do" and can't be bothered to stop and eat. If so, we'll have the outpatient procedure done on Friday and be home for the weekend. Enjoy the pictures...

Hospital Day Seven

Today is my 33rd birthday. Thanks to everyone for the balloons, cards, calls, emails, and thoughtful gifts. I'll respond soon. The celebration will have to wait - the show must go on.

This morning at 12:30 a.m. Jonathan unleashed again all over me in our sleep. This was a disappointing start to the day considering we had turned a corner yesterday. Although it was a bummer, Doctor Yasdi didn't seem to mind the fact that this is happening once a day considering what we suspect is the major cause. The nurse called him shortly after it happened and he ordered that we take a three hour break until 4 a.m. and schedule another x-ray first thing in the morning.

As he suspected and confirmed on the x-ray today, the NJ tube was still just slightly below the stomach. It's not surprising that some formula leaked back up into the stomach since it was so close. Later in the day they moved the tube down another 5 "ticks" so that it would sit lower in his GI tract. He also decided to lower the volume from 40 to 30 ml/hr at night so Jonathan can keep all of the progress in his system.

Our schedule was slightly altered. Tomorrow they are going put Jonathan under anesthesia for the endoscopy. They'll send the camera and light down into his tummy and look around for anything abnormal. I believe they are still going to take a few biopsies to test for inflammation. He's also going to draw some more blood and clean up or remove the current IV site while he's under. I suspect nothing will come back abnormal tomorrow.

Because he didn't want the stomach emptying test to be affected by the anesthesia, Doctor Yasdi moved it to Thursday. He wants to be absolutely sure Jonathan is "being himself" when we run the stomach emptying test. Assuming we've covered everything else and it all looks normal, this test should provide some solid answers. Thursday we should know what the course of action, solution, and remaining time frame will be...even if we get nothing back from this current process of elimination (no pun intended).

Job Update

Just a quick update. I had a phone interview today for a Business Analyst position at Compassion. I did the interview from our hospital room. I should know in a week or so if they are going to set up an interview in person. I do know that I'm in their "final four" and that this position will pay slight more then what I made at Focus.

I also got a call back today to schedule an interview for the VP of Finance position I blogged about last week. The interview is set for this Thursday at 11 a.m. Interestingly enough, this job should pay the same as the Compassion position.

Finally, I know the hiring manager at a large DoD contractor is looking at my resume for a Financial Analyst position. I'm just waiting to hear back on whether or not he/she wants to interview me.

When it rains it pours...

Hospital Day Six

Last night was a good night - Jonathan finally kept food down the entire time. The NJ tube that is going from his nose past his stomach and into his lower GI tract is doing its job. He's getting calories now without having to use his stomach.

Overall it was a slow day with nothing but a few labs (blood drawn) and an ultrasound on the schedule. However, it was another big day in terms of results and progress. The prior blood work that was sent for testing of a few other viruses came back negative. The blood work done today all came back normal except for his liver...however, his liver values had dropped by more then half of what they were yesterday. They are still slightly above normal, but they showed that he's rapidly recovering from whatever nasty "funk" he picked up at the Children's Museum 10 days ago. The fact that it took him this long on an IV and feeding tubes in the hospital confirms without a doubt that he needed to be admitted.

Around noon we had the ultrasound. Everything came back normal...liver, gall bladder, kidneys, bladder, etc. Obviously that was good news, so we were able to disconnect the IV. As of right now he's getting all of his fluids and calories from the NJ tube dumping it past his stomach. He's getting 120% of the calories he needs, just because we're playing catch up. He should tolerate it. He's already gained a half pound since we brought him in, so we should expect to see a decent jump in the next few days if he's "eating" this amount continuously (40 ml/hr, or 32 ounces of 24 calories per ounce per day). Speaking of, the food pump just went off and I started it up again. You know you've been in the hospital a little while when you know how to run the automatic feeder and IV without any assistance. So far we haven't needed the "main line" and are no longer taking Reglan. Both of those are good things. I read up about Reglan last night and that doesn't sound like something you want to be on for very long.

Tomorrow looks like a rest day. We'll continue feedings and maybe do another round of blood work (no news on that yet). The next big day will be Wednesday. I think we'll get our answer that day. We're going to stick an endoscope down his throat and take a look at his esophagus and stomach for signs of irritation, etc. They'll probably also do a biopsy of those areas to test the tissues. Those tests should help us determine if there is any damage and if there are signs of allergies. In what we assume will be the "final act", it sounds like we are also going to do the stomach emptying tests on Wednesday. After that, we'll be done unless something comes back abnormal.

So, based on what we have left, the culprits of the larger issue could either be one or a few of the following (which, by the way, are what we've identified as the leading suspects on our own too):

1) Reflux
2) Food Allergy
3) Delayed Gastric Emptying
4) No GI issues, it's a combo of low breast milk supply and behavioral/attention issues

Honestly, I think that the most likely outcome is number three (and a little of number one as a side effect of number three). If so, that will probably require a minor surgery and more time in the hospital. If not, we'll likely have the button put in on Friday and probably go home that day or Saturday. One thing is for certain: we're going to be here the rest of the week and our stay in the hospital is going to hit the 10 day mark.

Hospital Day Five

Last night we were given a clue. Jonathan had kept the food drip (NG tube) down all day and all night until 5:30 in the morning. Since he slept on me all night in the backpack (where he feels the most safe), this was my wake up call. I only slept about three to four hours last night to ensure he was able to sleep, so really I was awake when it happened. I don't think that makes it any better or worse though.

The clue given was clinging to my shirt, pants, and on the couch where we had slept. The night before at about 6:30 p.m. I had shared a few bites of a french fry. He probably only ate one entire fry, but it all came back up almost 11 hours after eating it...and it looked the same as it did when I gave it to him. I'm no expert, but 11 hours is way too long for a starch to be sitting in your stomach.

During this process we've talked about a motility disorder, or in simple terms, a delayed emptying of the stomach. For various reasons the outflow is extremely slow, resulting in many of the things we've observed with Jonathan. His body wants food, but he can't eat enough (or doesn't want to eat enough) because he stomach is full all the time. This can contribute to reflux, vomiting, and failure to thrive. Basically, he can't pump enough food through his stomach to meet what his body requires. This would explain why he always seemed hungry but would never eat, why he's small, why he would only eat a small amount at a time, and why he keeps vomiting at night with a constant drip (even as slow as what we've been doing). It would also explain why he tolerated us force-feeding him formula for a week or so until he started vomiting that too. Towards the end, the vomiting just increased in frequency. His system just wasn't keeping up.

After I consulted the veterinarian who brought this up as a possibility, our gastroenterologist came in and basically said the same thing. However, first thing was first, and he was concerned that Jonathan had essentially gone without vomiting (and we assume serious calories due to the vomiting and potential motility issues) for about a week now. Today we pulled out his NG tube and they threaded in a weighted tube that would bypass his stomach to get the nutrients lower down the GI tract. If the stomach wasn't going to cooperate, then we'd just have to bypass it for the time being. Towards the end of the day after getting that "drip" started you could tell he felt much better. The doctor also prescribed and had administered Reglan (Metoclopramide) to help with some of the symptoms (e.g. vomiting, minor reflux) we're assuming are associated with his slow stomach emptying.

One of the difficulties is that we still aren't sure what's causing his elevated liver count, suggesting there might still be an infection or virus present. We are limited in making any concrete conclusions about his GI tract because right now you could add on the phrase, "or, he's just still sick" to the end. All the test have come back negative so far but we haven't received the results of the mononucleosis and one other test yet. I think we are doing a balancing act of trying to have him keep food down so he'll recover yet not give him too much to cause all of our progress to be lost in one vomit session. I think the doctor is addressing the nutrition needs by going directly to the intestine, addressing the symptoms and slow stomach emptying now by also bypassing the stomach but giving him the drugs as well, attempting to figure out what's going on (if anything) with the liver via blood and urine work, and looking as much as possible at the structure of his GI tract to rule out any major issues.

Because of that, we're going to have an ultrasound done tomorrow. I think they should be able to tell a lot about the liver and size/structure of his GI tract to see if there is anything going on that might explain this. I don't think the doctor wants to run any stomach emptying tests until he rules out the structure issues and until we appear to get over whatever is causing the elevated liver count. We'll need more blood drawn to monitor his progress, which is another issue we're dealing with. They are having trouble finding good veins in Jonathan and if this turns into a long process, do not want to stick him multiple times to get blood. They may do a what they call a main line tomorrow - an IV/blood draw combo in one. I believe it goes into the artery under the arm and hangs right above the heart, but the advantages are that it's a one-time deal where they can repeatedly draw blood and give the IV. For some reason that seems a little scary to me, I don't know why.

Jonathan is taking this well, even though we can tell it's been extremely hard on him. He is such a sweetheart and only wants to be held by Dad or Mom...where he feels safe. That's why I've been sleeping with him, because it's comforting. I can tell he realizes nothing bad happens when Dad or Mom are holding him. Last night I decided that I just want him to come home and be the same little guy he was before he got sick, at least in terms of his playfulness and personality. Last night, when a nurse came in our room to do a simple blood pressure check, I had to lay him on the bed. He cried and cried until I was able to go back to the other side and give him a hug while he was laying on his back. He just latched on to me, gave me a big hug and wouldn't let go, and stopped crying the moment I "covered" him with myself. The procedure was completely painless of course, but the story just illustrates how worn out he really is. Most of the things he's had done really don't physically hurt that much, I think it's just scary for him...and that's what makes it hard for us. He doesn't know if someone is just coming in to listen to his heart or to poke him with a needle.

To end on a happy note, here's a really cute video from the first day in the hospital. Jonathan had somehow gained a burst of energy, which really didn't last much longer then the length of this video.

Hospital Day Four

Today was very uneventful since we are now just waiting for Jonathan to keep food in his little tummy. Some tests results came back and he doesn't have rotavirus or any of the major hepatitis viruses. He has something though since his liver count was slightly elevated. We took enough blood to screen for some of the other major ones out there like mononucleosis, but they take longer to come back. We haven't heard those results yet. The gastroenterologist stopped by and told us we're going to have an ultrasound on Monday to take a different look at his GI tract. That means Easter 2011 will be spent in the hospital. We'll probably do another test like a barium swallow (actually, a tiny amount will just be added to his food once he keeps it down) on Monday to monitor the rate his stomach empties. If his stomach empties very slowly due to a stomach enzyme deficiency, then that could also explain why he doesn't want to eat very much. His little tummy always feels full. That would be a simple fix - like taking a vitamin.

My parents and Julia came to visit for the first time. It was good to see them, especially Julia (no offense meant). They've been a big help just watching Julia. To have to juggle her amidst everything would have probably pushed us over the edge. Jules is feeling better now, keeping everything down, and almost back to 100%.

It's the day before Easter and it's snowing tonight. For those who have lived here for awhile, that's not very surprising. Jonathan and I are snuggled up together as I type this - he asleep in the backpack and I in the chair. We're pushing 12 hours now since we first started food. That and his first dirty diaper tonight are both firsts. I think we've reached the beginning of the end of his illness.

Here are some photos of Jonathan doing much better this afternoon. You can see the NG tube in his nose and the next IV spot on his head. They couldn't find a good vein this morning, so they used the scalp. Next up, they're going to plug him into the kiddie Matrix.

Hospital Day Three

Today we started to feel our stay in the hospital. Stacey and I had to take frequent breaks from being in the room and watching the procedures because we were physically, emotionally and mentally drained. We aren't in a very critical situation, but the lack of sleep and constant interruptions take their toll in addition to the "standard" stress you'd expect when your little child is in the hospital. Later that day I went home to sleep (it was my turn), crashed out at 7 p.m., and slept for 12 hours.

Since Jonathan wasn't able to keep any food down yesterday, and probably because they wanted an empty stomach for the barium test, they didn't give him any food until the afternoon. Shortly after noon Jonathan and I were escorted to Radiology for our first test - a barium swallow. Stacey took a break and left to visit our other sick child, Julia, at the grandparents. They tried to get him to drink the barium with a bottle at first, and not surprisingly he wanted nothing to do with it. So, they just injected it through his NG tube (the tube he has in his nose to his stomach). Immediately his entire stomach and upper GI tract were illuminated on the screen. The radiologist took a lot of pictures from different angles and watched the live shot on her monitors. Everything was in the right place, structurally speaking. We did see a little bit of the barium back up in his esophagus, but if he's still sick that could be the reason why. Reflux still might be a possibility for his lack of eating (and hence low weight) in the past, but it's too soon to tell. There are too many variables since he's been sick. We need him to keep food down and get over his illness before we can address any of the larger questions.

After the barium test he was finally given some more food. It was really hard (especially for Stacey) to know that Jonathan wanted and needed food, we could provide it, but we weren't "allowed". Once he started getting more food on a slow drip (20 ml/hr) at 2 p.m. he perked right up. He kept all of the food down until late last night at 11 p.m. Him vomiting it up was a major bummer, since he needed the calories and we can't do anything until he stops doing that. We still haven't gotten a real dirty diaper since he's been vomiting the last five days. We're just playing the waiting game now.

Hospital Day Two

Today was a pretty uneventful yet eventful day at the hospital. In the morning we had some more blood drawn but otherwise sat around. Since there was only one couch, Stacey and I decided to alternate nights sleeping at home. When I returned in the morning nothing else happened until we got a tube placed down his nose for feedings around lunch.

In the afternoon we tried three different times to feed him formula directly to his stomach through the tube. Each time he vomited it all up, despite decreasing the volume and rate each time. The very last attempt was the slowest drip possible and he still didn't like it. It could be as simple as he's still sick. He's understandably very hungry but at least he's hydrated and getting sugars from the IV.

After the unsuccessful feedings in the afternoon the doctor decided to call it a day. I drove over to my parent's house to see Julia (she's sick too) and my parents before picking up some clean clothes at home. When I returned, Stacey headed home for a good night's rest. Tomorrow we are going to start running some GI tests to figure out if there's an underlying issue as to why he won't eat (or eat very much). We should know a lot more (or at least be able to rule out some things) tomorrow. We'll also find out our options to get some calories in him other then through the nasal tube.

It sounds like we're going to be here for a few more days.

Memorial Hospital

Buddy boy...you're killing me smalls!

Today, after battling flu like symptoms since early Monday morning, we decided to take Jonathan to the pediatrician. He hadn't been able to keep fluids or food down for almost three days and had not eaten much the previous two days before that. He was very lethargic (understandably) and had lost almost a full pound over this time. After our visit to the pediatrician, we decided to hospitalize him in order to get more fluids and food in him. His doctor suspected that he had the rotavirus (everyone gets it but over time build an immunity to it).

Because we were going to be admitted to the hospital anyway, we also decided now was the time to run some of the tests that were inevitably coming. Our hope is that we will find some answers as to why he doesn't want to eat...either a medical or behavioral reason. If all the medical tests come back negative, we may need to pursue other options in the short term to get him enough nutrition. The simplest and easiest option is to have them put a tube directly into his stomach from his side. We can feed him that way until he learns to eat enough on his own over the coming weeks and months. Obviously, that would be a last resort.

We weren't completely sure what was going on until Julia also started to vomit after we had been admitted to the hospital. To us, it seemed pretty clear that we had caught something - probably at our visit to Children's Museum this past weekend.

I took these pictures when we first got to the hospital:



These pictures were taken the next morning, after about 15 hours on an IV. He was back to his old self and had gained back most of the weight he had lost. Although "playtime" was pretty short, it's good to know that he was probably just sick and that we made the right decision to bring him in. Our next goal is to get through all of the tests and arrive at a long-term feeding solution.

VP Of Finance

The job search has been pretty slow lately. Today, however, I received a call back (voicemail) from a small non-profit in town. They may be interested in talking to me about running their Finance Department and ~ $4.5 million program. Their mission focuses on early childhood development, and is pretty similar in ways to the mission at Focus. The job duties listed were very similar to what I did as the Assistant Controller, except that I would have an expanded role in management and operations.

More importantly, it looks like a step in the right direction. Although it will probably pay the same as my position at Focus, it's definitely a step up and would prepare me nicely for the future. I can get my feet wet and learn the job well in an appropriate-sized environment/organization and then years from now be able to take that next step. This is that intermediate step that I've talked to some of you about. My opinion is that you have to either go: little fish in a big pond or big fish in a little pond before becoming a big fish in a big pond. It just depends on if you prefer to work your way up in one organization or if you want to get experience at a smaller level and then change organizations. Obviously, this position would be very challenging - I'm not discounting it at all.

I meet all of the requirements and qualifications letter for letter (in my opinion). Perhaps the most interesting thing about this opportunity is that if ever there was an organization that would see me taking time off to support my wife and children as a huge POSITIVE and consistent with their same values, this would be it.

Allergy Boy?

This week has been pretty rough with Jonathan. Over the weekend we gave him the opportunity to self-regulate his food intake in hopes that the recent increase in calories had jump-started his appetite. Even though we constantly gave him food and drink, he only took in about 200 calories each day. Then, like clockwork, two days after the Children's Museum he could not keep any food or fluids down. Whenever we go to a public place, such as the nursery at church or and communal play area, someone ends up sick two days later.

The fact that he didn't eat much for a few days before and then went an entire day without any food was worrying, so I put him on the scale. In 3 days he lost 0.8 pounds. We started at 13.3, made it to 14.6, and now we're back to 13.8. But wait, there is a catch. In a last ditch attempt to get him to eat something on his own, I gave him some cow's milk. The next day (24 hours later) is when he got "sick". We know you're not supposed to give infants milk until they are a year old, but he's pretty close to that age. It dawned on us that formula also contains milk, and that he started having trouble with that about a week after we started formula.

We've done a lot of reading and low weight can be caused by a food allergy. We eat milk (sparingly), eggs, and nuts that all can be passed through breast milk. He has shown a few signs others have with a food allergy. Food allergies run in Stacey's family (she has a wheat allergy after all). The evidence has grown enough that we have decided we are going to take him in and get some lab work done. Maybe nothing will come back. Maybe the timing was just a coincidence and he's just sick. Maybe he's sick but a milk allergy pushed his immune system to a point where he couldn't fight off a bug (combo of the two). It will at least buy us peace of mind.

We're really hoping to find some answers soon. If we can get him to eat the right foods and exclude any wrong foods, he might feel better and finally pick it up on his own. If he's been fighting a tummy ache due to something like an allergy, it would sure explain a awful lot...for starters, why he doesn't want to eat. First thing is first - we've got to nurse him back to health from this current illess. If everything comes back clear, the next step would be to see a dietician/food therapist. We can't continue to force feed him in the long term.

Children's Museum Of Denver

This morning we all piled into the car and headed up to Denver to spend the day at the Children's Museum. We've been wanting to go there for awhile now since we knew Julia would love it. The word museum is a bit of a misnomer, since the entire building is hands on, interactive, and everything is "fair game" to play on, with, or in.

The first exhibit that we played at was the fire truck. There were multiple fire hats and jackets available for the kids to wear. There was a life-sized fire truck with a steering wheel, a muted siren, and light switches to play with. In one corner we learned about dialing 9-1-1 for an emergency and also met the local firehouse dalmatian. The fire exhibit was probably Julia's second favorite, but I think it was my favorite of the day. To see her dressed up in that outfit was hilarious.

These pictures were taken right after the museum opened, so we were able to play on it before the crowds showed up in the afternoon. In the afternoon the place was packed with kids. We went back to the fire truck exhibit in the afternoon and Julia had a difficult time getting back in the driver's seat. I kept telling her to politely ask the kid that was currently driving if she could take a turn, but most of the time they were oblivious to anything other then their own impulses. She was so polite, aware, and socially interactive compared to almost every other kid. There were times when she cut in line, but we made sure it was a "teachable moment".




Admittedly (and based on the frequency of repeat visits), Julia's favorite area was the supermarket. This doesn't surprise me since she pretends to go shopping, etc, at home. This exhibit was probably like a dream come true for her - kiddie sized shopping carts, shelves, play food, and even a check out line. Once Julia carefully organized the food in her cart that she grabbed from the shelves, she waited patiently for another kid to check her out with the play scanner gun. Then, she'd put the food back into her cart very carefully, and in an organized fashion, and then return it to the shelves. Then, the entire process would start again.




In third spot was the bubble area. Just like at home, she loved chasing the bubbles in the air until they popped. The bubbles were so big and she did it for so long that her hair was full of soap by the time we were through. I had to constantly wipe off her safety glasses and head/face since the most entertaining game was to get the bubble to pop above her head so that it would explode all over her face. We also briefly played with a big bubble maker and watched the older kids hoist a giant bubble wall all around them with a rope while standing inside it.

She also played around in the painting room, briefly at the toy train exhibit, and finally at the workshop (complete with real tools and all sorts of materials). Needless to say, this was like "heaven" for her. I'm sure we'll go back at some point since it was obvious how much fun she had. She asked to go back tomorrow if that's any indication.

Formula Day One

Tomorrow we're going to start the transition to a sippy cup instead of feeding Jonathan from a syringe. We've been at it for about three and and half weeks and feel like now would be a good time to start. He'll now drink water from a sippy cup when he's thirsty, knows/likes the taste of formula, and has levelled out on his weight gain suggesting we've brought him up to the level he should be at. More importantly, we've limited his dependence on breast feeding.

We're expecting him to take a couple of days to transition to eating on his own. We may have to step in here and there to make sure he stays hydrated. He'll probably lose some of the weight he's gained. One of our biggest concerns is that even if he transitions, he won't eat enough (like when he was just nursing). He's easily distractable and eating seems like an afterthought or an inconvience. He might just make a pit stop long enough to keep going but will revert back to running on fumes.

I think we've eliminated the possibility of an ear infection/sickness and hope that his vomiting has just been because of the process involved in force feeding him. The hardest part about the entire issue is that it appears only two things could be going on - both on the opposite end of the spectrum. Either he's perfectly normal and just a poor eater or he does have some medical issue that has not been detected. Everything points to the former, but both present problems.

Although frustrating most of the time, we still we blessed to have such cute and good-natured kids.

Good Thing We Have A Steam Cleaner

Buddy boy is already giving us gray hair and he hasn't even had his first birthday. Jonathan threw up two more times today. We've been trying to feed him the past week or so but he hasn't been interested in food. At first we thought he might just have a stomach bug and that we just needed to let it take its course. The minutes, hours, and days are passing and things aren't changing much.

This all started after Jonathan caught a cold (or some funk) after playing in a "common area". Since then, his cold has gone away but he has since been vomiting and having really bad diapers. To complicate matters he's also teething right now. We're fighting to get fluids and calories in him with a syringe yet he keeps "giving some of it back". He's been burping a lot too - either because something is going on in his stomach or because of the way we've been feeding him. Lately he's been grabbing his ear, but we're not convinced he has an ear infection yet. If this keeps up for another day or so, I don't know what else we can do except to get him checked out for an ear infection. I kind of hope that's what's going on. If not, considering the recent visit to the gastroenterologist, I'm going to start worrying that something more serious is going on.

Not to compare kids, but we didn't realize how easy we had it with Julia until now.

Tottenham 0-1 Real Madrid (Aggregate 0-5)

We all hoped for a miracle from the soccer gods, but apparently they don't exist (soccer gods, that is). All kidding aside, we're officially out of the Champions League. We made it to the quarterfinals in our first season, played some outstanding football, won our group, and beat both Inter and A.C. Milan along the way. I can't complain one bit. I'm not going to waste any time talking about the second leg tonight because it was pretty much meaningless. I'm just glad that we had this experience and hope that we can qualify for the competition again next season.

I've saved all of the highlight videos from this tournament. It could be a long time before we compete in it again if we miss out on qualifying this season. Since this run has produced so many great memories and moments that might not be duplicated in the near future, I wanted to have them accessible for viewing. Let's hope we only have to wait until this coming autumn to see Spurs in the Champions League again.

We So Excited

Today I pulled out Michelle's old karaoke machine from storage. I figured Julia was old enough to play with it now that she knows a few songs on our iPod. This video is her first attempt at singing with a "live" microphone.

You can tell that she doesn't quite know what to think about it. I was trying to help her by singing and dancing in the background, but she pretty much just stared at me. Towards the end of the song she finally got the hang of it and asked me to stop singing. I must have been flat.

Although she doesn't move much, her reaction to the microphone and the sound of her voice on the high notes is pretty darn cute. I think Rebecca Black is going have some competition...

10 Months Old

Our little chunky monkey has gained an entire pound in two weeks since we've been feeding him with a syringe. An 8% gain in body weight is a nice return for our efforts.

Although usually all smiles, he has a determined streak. I was able to capture this in the middle picture (while he was storming the beaches of Normandy to get the camera).

Real Madrid 4-0 Tottenham

In 15 quick minutes our Champions League run came to an end. There is not much to say except that tonight was a disaster. It's all over. The fact that we were beaten is not the issue. It's how it happened. This has been a bit of a "Cinderella" run - we definitely are not one of the top four or even top eight teams in the world. However, this was not the way to go out, when our time was up.

Right before kickoff, Aaron Lennon was scratched because he was sick. Imagine preparing for days/weeks only to have things shuffled at the last minute. We had to replace him with Jenas, a player many fans don't think is good enough for the domestic league, let alone the Champions League. Jenas was marking Adebayor when he scored with only 3 minutes and some change on the clock. As a former Arsenal player, this added insult to injury. However, this game was not about winning...it was about keeping it close and giving ourselves a chance in the second leg at home. Going a goal down was disappointing, but it wasn't unexpected and the end of the world.

For some reason, our only striker (Crouch) decided to leave his brain back in London. Twice in the span of the first 15 minutes he made unnecessary lunges for a ball. For being late on each tackle and taking the opponent out, he received two yellow cards and was ejected from the game. Strikers never get red carded unless it's for something unnecessary - period. They are the ones that get fouled, not the other way around. The fouls were unnecessary, late, and completely irrelevant. As a former player, I sincerely hope he is big enough (no pun intended) to apologize to his teammates. It's one thing to make a mistake, it's another to make two boneheaded moves in a few minutes and put your team down a man. Although he has been a big part of getting us this far, he essentially ended it all in a few short minutes.

The rest of the match was played in our half. All I was hoping was that we could keep the score close enough. We played well, but after going a man down for almost an entire game against one of the best teams in the world, the chances were slim. All the hype and excitement before the game started ended quickly. It was completely deflating. I would have preferred to go out fighting in a "blaze of glory" with no regrets. Instead, we are only left with 10 men and to wonder what might have been. We chased the ball and played defense the entire night. This was not the Tottenham that I've seen in this season's Champions League...but the point is, we weren't even given the chance. No regrets? Hardly.

Job Latest

It's been about two months now since I started looking...not much to report. I've got my application in on a job at Compassion, but it's going to take a few weeks (at least) before I hear anything back on that position. My "contacts" have already put in a good work for me and delivered my cover letter/resume to the hiring manager...so it's probably the best and only lead I have right now.

As the weeks and months go by, I'll get more serious about my search. For the past two months I've been looking almost every day, but only for one to two hours at a time. I also need to start expanding where I look. I've averaged an interview every two weeks, but they were mostly in the beginning stages of my search. Lately I haven't had much action.

One of my concerns is that I may be in "no man's land". I'm over-qualified for any entry level position, yet I may not have enough experience in one area to be considered for a supervisory or leadership role...nor do I have a lot technical expertise for some of the jobs I'm seeing. Eventually something will turn up though.

Uncle Pat's Visit

Julia loved having Pat around this weekend. I think she has a new BFF. It was nice to have another set of hands around the house to entertain her as well. We told Pat he can come and stay with us any time he wants!

We took these pictures quickly since Jonathan needed to go down for a nap. He was on the verge of a meltdown. I know he's starting to look more and more like me everyday, but his resemblance to Stacey in these pictures is uncanny. What? I can't pass up an opportunity like that!

Teamwork

This was entirely the kids' idea. I'd say Jonathan is pretty close to walking.

Pillow Fort Nap

Julia loves "pillow forts". Uncle Pat made this one today, and just for fun, we let her take a nap in it.